The article, which is my first published fiction effort, is to my understanding unique: a love story written in the form of a law review article. Law review articles are traditionally stuffy, serious, and purportedly scholarly (and often long-winded) expositions on frequently obscure (and deservedly so) aspects of the law, noted (literally) for their extensive use of footnotes containing specific references to legal cases, statutes, treatises, and other "authorities," which references are painstakingly drafted to comport precisely with the rigors of official legal citation style. Many of the citations are real (selected for their James Bond movie dialogue-like double entendres in the present context); some I simply made up (this is fiction, after all).